BEYOND
BEYOND
Episode 13 BEYOND: 12 Lessons Transformation Taught Me
Have you ever wondered about the true power of consistency over perfection?
After a transformative year of working with a personal trainer alongside my husband, I’m here to share twelve life-changing lessons about commitment, personal growth, and the strength found in pushing past discomfort. From celebrating small victories to the critical role of a strong support system, I'll take you through the mindset shifts that have helped me prioritize health and well-being. Together, we'll explore how consistent effort and embracing the challenge can lead to profound changes in your life.
We'll also tackle the tough yet rewarding journey of embracing failure and building mental resilience. Learn about the difference between perceived limits and actual physical limits, and how pushing through challenging workouts has uncovered the powerful connection between mental and physical strength. Dive into the healing benefits of weight training and running, understanding the necessity of rest.
As we conclude, I’ll emphasize the importance of taking actionable steps toward transformation and the power of starting now.
Don’t forget to share your insights and spread these impactful conversations with friends.
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Hello, my friend, and welcome to Beyond the personal growth podcast for the people who are healing beyond their conditioning and beyond the cycles that played out before them. My name is Katie Lynn and, with 20 years of experience in the field of psychology and human behavior, I am bringing my natural curiosity, expertise and personal life experiences here for discussions that are guaranteed to be informative, inspiring and entertaining. I'm glad you're here. Let's get started. So, those of you who have listened to episodes before this one, you have probably heard especially if you've listened to episode 10 or episode 12, you have probably heard me mention my trainer, and this week, my husband and I celebrated our one-year anniversary of working with our personal trainer, which is a huge milestone for us because we are both former athletes and have been training inconsistently for most of our lives. And when we decided to sign up and begin this process with our trainer last July it's actually July 17th, 2023, we knew that we were embarking on a lifestyle change. It was really important to us that we fully commit. By fully committing, we knew that we weren't going for perfection, we were going for consistency. We were all in on our commitment, meaning that it was consistency and effort over everything for us, rather than being all or nothing on a commitment which is different, energetically being all or nothing is more like you show up consistently for a week and then you miss a day and then, because you miss a day, you stop the whole process, and that was something that had been a theme for me personally in the past. My commitments were more all or nothing rather than all. In Last year we decided let's go all in.
Speaker 1:I was really, really reflective as we celebrated the one year mark. I wanted to do just a celebration episode, because part of this process has taught me how to celebrate myself celebrate the micro achievements. I used to be the kind of woman who wanted the big achievements and I would forget that those big achievements came as a result of decisions and habits and thoughts and practices that I engaged in every single day leading up to that big achievement. In this particular process, I really was committed to celebrating every single thing celebrating that I showed up and was on time for a workout. Celebrating that I did the reps. Celebrating that I completed a workout. Celebrating that I showed up and was on time for a workout. Celebrating that I did the reps. Celebrating that I completed a workout. Celebrating that I gave my effort. So on this episode, I wanted to share with you the 12 things that I have learned about commitment and myself, and just the lessons that I've gleaned so far from being in this process for a year. And what I mean by this process is I'm talking about weightlifting three to four times a week, and then I also started running through that period of time. So I started running probably back in April of this year, being in that consistent athlete training mindset with the goal of showing up and giving the best effort that I can and getting 1% better every single time.
Speaker 1:The first thing that I learned as a result of being in this process and changing my lifestyle to be that of a woman who takes care of her body, eats clean moves every day, the first thing that I learned is that the fastest way to kill your dreams is to remain comfortable. Get uncomfortable as often as possible. I have been sore almost weekly in this process. Getting uncomfortable is a part of transformation. I want to also point out that comfort and safety are two different things. I have been safe throughout this whole process. There's monitoring and adjusting that's happening throughout this whole process to make sure that we are safe, we're doing it properly, we are pushing hard enough and not overtraining, and still it's uncomfortable. The thing that you want to create, the thing that you want to bring forward in life, is going to ask you and require you to get uncomfortable. So get uncomfortable as often as possible.
Speaker 1:Number two is get support and, like I've told you, we have a trainer. He's one of my supports in this process. My husband is my other support in this process. My family supports this process. Right, there are people in my corner who understand that this is who I am, this is who I'm becoming, and are cheering me on. And in the moments when my brain tries to fight for my familiarity meaning my old way of life, I have sounding boards who are people that love me and care about me and understand that I have a bigger vision, who can reflect back to me that that's really not what I want to do, because our brains and you've heard me say this if you've listened to any of the previous episodes our brains are not designed to transform like this. They're really not. They're designed for familiarity, because our brains translate safety as what is familiar, that which is familiar, that which we have done before, experienced before, lived through before and because we've lived through it, we can live through it again. That's the assumption our brain makes. So get support.
Speaker 1:Number three is true strength is who you are when it's time to fulfill your commitment to yourself. Your willpower is low and no one is watching that right there, especially in the first three months, because the first three months we literally transformed our diets and so we cleaned our diets up like they were sparkling clean, like there was no sugar, no off plan meals, no bread, no cheese. No, it was super clean, right. Protein veggies, dark green veggies and maybe a half a cup of rice or sweet potato here and there. The willpower when you combine that with your body being physically sore and you are training in a new way and you're out of your comfort zone and I don't know about you, but I used to still lean into food as a source of comfort, as a source of I'm okay or I can just have a little treat or whatever it is and use it as a way to soothe myself. That was not available any longer as an option. That's where I really learned true strength, because it's one thing to appear strong, it's one thing to be like I am strong because I have done X, y and Z. It's another thing to be strong in a moment when you know that you are tired. You are fatigued. You've been with kids all day, you've been serving people all day, you have trained really hard, your muscles are sore and all you want to do is sit down and have a bag of chips and you get to say no. Right, you get to say no, and that is true strength. Number four is, again, having the right support. Having the right support will 10X your results. So I know, in number two I said get support. When I mean get support in number two, I mean get people in your circle that are going to help you to stay in the proper mindset and cheer you on. Number four, this support is about having the proper support.
Speaker 1:Getting a trainer right Was one of the things that my husband and I knew that we needed if we were going to do this. Because, again, we're former athletes and both of us were really working through this habit of being all or nothing in our commitments right and I think a lot of people who have been former athletes can relate to this where your brain forgets that you're not in your peak condition anymore. So you'll go into the gym try to do a workout that you did 10 or 15 years ago and your body is not there yet. And we needed an expert in our corner to really pace our workouts and make sure that we, our form, was still proper, make sure that we're developing our muscles properly, so that there's no overuse, uh, and that the distribution of training is very even across our entire body, very methodical, because I don't know about you, but I love training legs. I don't like training chest, I don't like training arms, uh, and still, every week, I train chest and I train arms because that is healthy, well-distributed, well-balanced training. That's what I mean by get support is get the people in your world, whether it's a mindset coach, whether it's a personal coach, whether it's a therapist, whether it's a personal trainer. My husband and I also go to this physical therapy slash recovery lab where they stretch us and we do cupping and things like that, because that's what we need. Having the right support in your corner will 10X your results.
Speaker 1:Number five is be your biggest cheerleader and practice healthy self-talk as often as possible. Healthy self-talk wasn't something that I didn't really know how to do. I could believe in myself, meaning that I could. I could set a goal and be like, okay, I'm going to go get this. But the practice of really cheering myself on and saying, you can do this, you've got this, I believe in you. One more, take a deep breath, we can do this that kind of talk felt silly to me. And it works. It really, really works, especially when you've got heavy weights on you and you're pushing them up, or when you are at the end of your workout and your trainer has structured like a finisher that you feel like, oh my gosh, where am I going to get the strength to do this? Where am I going to get the energy to do this? Learning how to talk to yourself we have clips on social media of athletes doing this right, where they're mic'd up during a game and you can hear them talking to themselves, and I really took that on. It is so helpful. So I encourage it. Whether you call it affirmations, whether you call it personal self-talk, start speaking to yourself like you're somebody that you believe in and somebody that you want to win.
Speaker 1:Number six is fail. Harvest the lesson, learn and implement. This one is huge. You have to fail. You absolutely positively have to fail, because failure is a part of success and as obvious as it may seem for us, right?
Speaker 1:We use that metaphor of like when a baby learns how to stand and then they go from standing to walking. And you know there's, they're going to take to stand. And then they go from standing to walking and they're going to take a step and then they're gonna fall, and then they're gonna get back up and then they're gonna take another step and then they're gonna fall. It's the same, it's no different. It's no different with us as adults. So pursue that, start taking the actions. Get the feedback that you're doing it wrong, or that you're not doing it wrong, or that you're not doing it well, or that there's a different way to do it that might be more efficient or more effective, or both, and then make those adjustments and learn what it was about your mindset, what it was about your form, what it was about your strength that caused you to do it that way in the first place, and then make those adjustments. That's how we refine ourselves, and that, to me, is what makes this process really fun.
Speaker 1:Is I got to learn how to not just fail, but how to pursue failure, how to welcome it and say come in, I'm here and I want to experience you so that I can see what's here for me, how I treat me after I fail, where my self-talk is. How resilient have I become? How committed am I really to this process? How committed am I to becoming the woman I say I want to become? Do I talk a big game and say, yes, I'm going to be her, and dah, dah, dah, dah, dah, and then, as soon as hardship comes up or difficulty or failure comes up, then I quit. That's not who I want to be. Pursue failure, harvest the lesson, learn, get back up and implement.
Speaker 1:Number seven is there's a huge difference between feeling like you can't and truly being at your limit. The first three months of this process was me learning the difference between feeling like I can't and actually being at my limit. But there is research that says that the mind will quit well before the body is done. Usually, when the mind says I can't go anymore, people still have about 60% more effort to give. Hearing that blew my mind and I have seen it to be true, and I can't tell you how many times I have done a grueling workout in the gym in the morning grueling I'm talking like I am so exhausted I feel like I might throw up. My legs feel like noodles, and it's usually leg day. My legs feel like noodles and I am like done, and then I leave and I go home and I shower and in two hours I'm ready to go, I'm ready to do another workout. If I needed to do another workout, I could do another workout, because our body is designed to reset itself and to do that.
Speaker 1:When your brain says you can't, it's probably not true 90% of the time, and what I learned about me personally through this process is that I can't. That sentiment comes from my head when I really really know that I am complete and there is no more effort to give. That knowing comes from my head when I really really know that I am complete and there is no more effort to give that knowing comes from my belly. It comes from a different place and if you've ever done the power process, you will know how to identify and discern what your intellect is, what your mind is and what your intuition is. And that is one huge, powerful gift to have, because you can be so clear about what's accurate. What is that divine truth in you and what is that truth ego, that mental conditioning in you.
Speaker 1:Number eight is you've got shadow work to do and it will show up as soon as you start moving your body. The shadow work is the stuff that you haven't wanted to heal. It's either been totally unconscious so you don't even know it's there, or you've known it there but you haven't really wanted to look it in the face. And as soon as you start moving your body it will show up for you. It will absolutely show up for you and it will feel strong and you will feel like how am I going to face this? And it's not stronger than you. It's showing up for you because you have the ability to heal it when it shows up. So dive in and moving the body will quicken this process.
Speaker 1:Process Nine is weight training and running is better than any drug or ceremony. That's a big one. So if you know anything about my history, you know I've done many, many, many plant ceremonies. I have done many different healing modalities. Weight training and running by far has been more fruitful for me personally in terms of healing and spiritual training and all of that.
Speaker 1:Number 10 is rest is important and I got to be honest with you on this one. I still don't love rest. I still wrestle with this one. I love to sleep. Don't get me wrong, I'm a Taurus sun, so I love to sleep. But rest in terms of like taking days off, I don't have a good time doing that. I love the intensity of training. I love to train. I'm still working on that one, but it is important, I will tell you it is. It's very important.
Speaker 1:And then the last two are when you are making significant progress and you are really truly, truly, truly transforming. You will hit a point in the process where it is boring and redundant and you feel like is anything happening? I'm doing all the right things and I don't know if it's working or not. That's really a place where you get to mentally grow and be mentally strong, because you'll get bored, and this boredom really taught me how to be creative. It taught me how to think differently. It taught me how to develop mindset hacks per se, or practices that helped me to get through the fatigue when it shows up, to help me to stay on track and not abandon the process, to really help me stick with it. And I'm so grateful that I did, because my whole life is different now. It comes with boredom and I remember my trainer just being like look, you just got to give it time. Now you have the nutrition locked in, you have the workouts locked in. It's just a consistency in time game, consistency over time. That's important. And then the final thing is life will continue to life on you as you embark on transformation.
Speaker 1:The world doesn't stop turning when you decide you're going to change your life. As much as I would love for you and I to have ideal circumstances for transformation, transformation doesn't wait for ideal circumstances. Transformation is like I'm here and I'm knocking at your door and I know you have kids and I know you have a husband and I know that this is not the best time and I will tell you that there is no right time for transformation. There is no perfect time to start a transformation. It's now. There is no better time than now, especially because we live in a dynamic world and there's a lot going on all at once. You're going to need to show up anyway and life doesn't really calm down, especially if you are a high achiever, especially if you have people who rely on you, if you're a founder and you have people relying on you, or you are an entrepreneur, or you are a mother or a wife or a partner on top of that, like there is no slowing down right, there is no. You can have certain things in place for sure, but the transformation has got to happen. The circumstances will not be perfect for it. So get started.
Speaker 1:And the reason I say get started is because, number one, you can't buy the time back, especially with something like this, where it's a physical transformation. Like I can't buy the time back that I didn't weightlift in my twenties. I can't buy the time back that I took off for two or three years in my early 30s. It's so important because every day is a deposit in my bank and I want that to compound over time now and really leverage that to the best of my ability. So it's important that I create the space and that I refine what I'm committed to and really say yes to things that are aligned and say no to things that aren't, so that I refine what I'm committed to and really say yes to things that are aligned and say no to things that aren't, so that I can maximize my efforts and really be this transformation and it's worth it. The reason I say that is because it's really about being mentally strong, being mentally sound. Having all of those good chemicals that come as a result of working out flowing in your brain is incredible. Being physically strong is amazing, especially as a woman.
Speaker 1:I'm 38 years old. I'm staring perimenopause in the face, which will be followed by menopause at some point. I want to maintain my muscle mass. I want to put on muscle if I can. If you know what's coming, then my stance is prepare yourself for it. If you know what's coming, to the best of your ability, set yourself up for success. And that, to me, is what empowerment means. Empowerment means I can equip myself, I can be empowered with my beliefs and my thoughts and my actions and my outcomes, and I can be consistent and I can be all in and I can really be clear about who I am and who I'm becoming. That is my spiel and my celebration for this week, and I wanted to share it with you.
Speaker 1:In case you are considering any type of transformation in your life, anything that's been nagging you for the last few years that you just haven't actioned yet, I'm here to tell you one, you can. Two, start today. And three, it'll be so worth it. As we complete this episode, I would love to know your insights, takeaways and feedback. You can message me on Instagram at katielinrojano, or send them via email to katie at katielinrojanocom. Any products or digital downloads I mentioned can be found via the link in my Instagram bio. If you enjoyed this episode, I encourage you to share it with at least one friend and leave a five-star review so we can get these impactful dialogues into the lives of even more people. I would also like to thank my guests for their vulnerability and generosity in allowing us to learn from them and grow alongside them. Until next time, friends, let's go beyond.